Monday, July 18, 2011

The NEW Ant and the Grasshopper

The ANT
AND THE
GRASSHOPPER

This one is a little different ....
 
Two Versions ... 
Two Different Morals
 

OL D VERSION 

The
ant works
hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The
grasshopper
thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances, drinks beer and smokes dope, and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the
ant is warm
and well fed.
 

The
grasshopper has
no food or shelter, so he
dies out in the cold.



MORAL OF THE OLD STORY:


Be responsible for yourself!
 

 

 


MODERN
VERSION

The
ant works hard
in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house
and laying up supplies for the winter.

The
grasshopper thinks the ant
is a fool and laughs and dances, drinks beer and smokes dope, and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering
grasshopper
calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be
allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN,
and ABC show up to
provide pictures of the shivering
grasshopper
next to a video of the ant
in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor
grasshopper
is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog
appears
on
Oprah
with the grasshopper
and everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green...'

ACORN stages
a demonstration in front of the
ant's
house where the news stations film the SEIU group singing, We shall overcome.

Then 
Rev. Jeremiah Wright 
has the group kneel down to pray for thegrasshopper's sake,
while he damns the ants.


President Obama
 condems the ant 
and blames 
President Bush 43, President Bush 41, President Reagan, capitolism, and the Pope 
for the grasshopper's
plight. 

Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid
 
exclaim in an interview with Larry
King
 that the ant has
gotten rich off the back of
 the
grasshopper,
and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share. 

Finally, the
EEOC drafts
the
 Economic Equity &
Anti-Grasshopper Act
retroactive to the beginning of
the summer.

The
ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number 
of green bugs and, 
having  nothing left to  pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government GreenCzar
and given  to the grasshopper.

The story ends as we see the
grasshopper
and his free-loading  friends finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is  in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house,
crumbles around them because the
grasshopper doesn't  maintain it.

The
ant has  disappeared in the snow, never to be seen again.

The
grasshopper  is found  dead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken
over
  by a gang of spiders  who terrorize the ramshackle, once prosperous  and peaceful, neighborhood. 

The entire
Nation collapses
bringing the rest
 
of the free world with it. 


MORAL OF THE STORY: 


Be careful how you vote in 2012.



I've sent this to you because I believe that you are an
ant

not a
 grasshopper!

Make sure that you pass
this on to other
ants.

Don't bother sending
it on to any
grasshoppers
because they wouldn't
understand it, anyway

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